Embracing the Mess: Welcome to Confessions of a Wayward Baker

😳There I was, staring agape at the two pounds of butter now coating my kitchen cabinets, stove hood, and floor like some sort of dairy farm crime scene. One minute, I was baking smarter, not harder—trying to streamline my brownie prep—the next, my kitchen looked like a Jackson Pollock painting in butter yellow.

As it turns out, butter follows the same rules as relationships: too much heat, too fast, and things get messy.💥

Welcome to Confessions of a Wayward Baker

Baking isn’t just about mixing ingredients and following instructions—it's a journey. A journey filled with towering successes, humbling failures, and the lessons that rise from the flour-dusted chaos. This blog isn’t about perfection; it’s about what happens when things go sideways and what we learn in the process. Here, I’ll share my wins, my flops, the why behind what happens in the kitchen, and the deeper truths that emerge from baking and life.

Expect tested and trusted recipes, forays into food science, and reflections on what baking can teach us about resilience, adaptability, and embracing the mess—both in and out of the kitchen.

Understanding the why behind things has always been my obsession. At one point, I was a psychology major minoring in neuroscience, and that love of digging deeper and figuring out how things work never left me. Whether it’s the chemical reactions that make a cake rise or the mental shifts that help us overcome perfectionism, I want to unpack it all.

So, whether you’re here for the recipes, the science, or a reminder that perfection is overrated, welcome. Now, back to that butter explosion…🧈💥

What Went Wrong? (AKA: Why Did My Butter Betray Me?) 🧈💣

I had this brilliant plan: melt all the butter I needed for multiple batches of brownies at once. Got the first batch mixed, and then—life happened. By the time I got back to the butter, it had cooled and resolidified.

No problem, right? Just turn the heat back on, walk away for a second, and—

BOOM.

I forgot the most important rule of melting butter: low and slow. Butter is about 20% water, and when you overheat it too quickly, that water rapidly turns into steam. 💨 When the steam has nowhere to escape, pressure builds—then,💣 SKADOOSH! 💥If you’ve ever tried melting butter on full power in the microwave (so, everyone), you know exactly what happens next. Now, picture my beautiful blue kitchen as the inside of that poor, unsuspecting microwave, and you’ll have a pretty good idea of the mess I was dealing with.

Butter Not Lose My 💩

I was already behind on prepping for a huge market, and I did not have time for a meltdown (though my butter certainly did). Enter my daughter, who, seeing my barely contained frustration, simply offered to help. And in that moment, I realized I had a choice:

1. React (snap, yell, curse my existence)

2. Respond (accept the situation, get creative, and move on)

I chose the second option. I took a breath, let go of the frustration, and we got to work.

Looking back, I wonder if the choice was made easier by something I had done earlier that day. Just hours before, I had gone to an intentional rage room—a place designed for breaking things so you don’t break yourself. There, I got to write things I needed to release on a wine bottle and hurl it at a wall while scream-singing Limp Bizkit. And let me tell you, I had a lot to release.

I was shocked by how much I had been carrying. With every throw, I felt years of frustration, stress, and exhaustion shatter into a thousand tiny pieces. My shoulder was sore for three days after. At one point, someone in the rage room looked over at me and said, "You've got some 💩 to get out." They weren’t wrong. But the funniest part? The first time I threw my bottle, it didn’t even break—I had to pick it up and throw it again.

And isn’t that life? Sometimes, we expect a single act of release to be enough, but healing, like baking, is a process. Some things take time. Some things need multiple throws. And if we don’t take the time to process the mess—the butter explosions, the setbacks, the moments where life gets lifey—we risk letting them build up until they spill over at the worst possible moment.

That experience reminded me that self-care isn’t a luxury—it’s a necessity. Processing our emotions, finding an outlet, and letting things go (even if it takes more than one try) allows us to move forward. Maybe smashing bottles had already drained some of my pent-up frustration, leaving me better prepared to handle the chaos in my kitchen with a little more grace.

And the first step to handling this butter-slathered 💩 show? Potato starch.

Why Potato Starch?

Starches, like potato or cornstarch, are hydrophilic—they attract and absorb fats and moisture. Sprinkling a liberal amount of potato starch over the buttery disaster helped bind the grease, making it easier to sweep up instead of just smearing it around.

After that, a hot water, dish soap, and vinegar solution did the trick. The science?

• Dish soap is amphiphilic, meaning it can bond with both water and fat, breaking up grease molecules.

• Vinegar is acidic, which helps cut through the butter's richness and lift it off surfaces.

🔬 Science (and my glorious child) saved the day—and my sanity. 🧽🫧

The Brownies That Started It All

And since we’re talking about baking smarter, not harder, let’s make sure that butter (when handled correctly) actually ends up in the brownies where it belongs.

This recipe is everything a brownie should be: deep, fudgy, slightly gooey in the center, and rich enough to require a glass of milk on standby. I use brute cocoa, melted chocolate, and sour cream for maximum decadence. Bonus: You can brown the butter—just don’t explode it.

🍫 Big, Bold, and Beautiful Brownies

Ingredients

• 225g butter

• 115g chocolate (55-70% cocoa solids)

• 75g granulated sugar

• 175g brown sugar

• 3 large eggs, room temperature

• 1 tbsp vanilla extract

• 85g cocoa powder (brute preferred, Dutch-process at minimum)

• 125g all-purpose flour

• 1.5 tsp salt

• 60g sour cream, room temperature

• 225g chopped semi-sweet chocolate (optional but highly recommended)

Instructions

1. Prepare your ingredients:

   • Place the flour in a small bowl.

   • Combine the chocolate & cocoa powder in a medium heatproof bowl.

   • Measure salt & vanilla into a small dish.

   • Crack the eggs into a jug and let them come to room temperature.

   • Measure sour cream into a small bowl and allow to come to room temperature.

   • Measure sugars into a separate small bowl.

2. Melt the butter: In a saucepan, gently melt the butter over low heat until fully liquefied. (For bonus flavor you can brown the butter!) Pour it over the cocoa and chopped chocolate, letting it sit for 5 minutes, so the chocolate can melt and the cocoa bloom, before stirring until smooth. 

3. Add the sugars: Whisk in sugars until combined making sure to break up any clumps.

4. Incorporate the eggs: Add the eggs one at a time. At this point, the mixture may look curdled, clumpy, or separated, but keep whisking, and it should come together into a glossy, emulsified batter.

5. Add the remaining wet ingredients: Stir in the sour cream, vanilla, and salt until fully combined.

6. Incorporate the dry ingredients: Gently fold in the flour, mixing just until no dry streaks remain. Do not overwork the batter.

7. Bake: Pour the batter into a greased 9x9-inch pan and bake at 350°F (175°C) for 25-30 minutes, or until the edges are set and the center is slightly gooey.

8. Cool completely: Let the brownies cool at room temperature before cutting into squares. (Trust me, the wait is worth it.)

🤔 Final Thoughts (or, How Not to Explode Butter Again) 🧈💡

• Melt butter LOW & SLOW. Never walk away from butter on heat. (Lesson learned.)

• Starch is your grease-fighting best friend. Keep potato or cornstarch handy! All-purpose flour can work in a pinch too!

• Respond, don’t react. Especially when life (or butter) gets messy.

• Self-care matters. Whether it's smashing wine bottles or baking a batch of brownies, find what helps you reset.

• When in doubt, bake brownies. Preferably these.

Have you ever had a baking disaster that turned into a life lesson? Tell me in the comments—I promise, no judgment… unless you also managed to coat your kitchen in butter.